Hospitality

Written by Mrs. Angela Swieter

Romans 12:13b instructs us to "practice hospitality."

This is a command. Webster defines hospitality as "...the act of ...welcoming guests with warmth and generosity."

Ponder the words Jesus said in Matthew 25 to those who did not show hospitality. "Depart from me, you who are cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. For I was hungry and you gave me nothing to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, I was a stranger and you did not invite me in, I needed clothes and you did not clothe me, I was sick and in prison and you did not look after me." This tells me that (for a Christian) hospitality is not an option.

Being Hospitable Even in Time of Need

True hospitality is sharing what we have. How easy it is to share from abundance. There is no sacrifice to this and is a pleasant thing to do. However, consider the trust it requires when we share from the little that we have. I remember a time when I had little prepared for a large group of unexpected guests.

All I could do was share from what little we had.

It was a late afternoon in January of 1996 when a blizzard-like condition began. We were living in a farmhouse along a main highway and many cars were going in the ditch around our home. The weather was severely cold and the visibility was terrible. My husband and sons dressed up, got the tractor running, and began pulling cars out of the ditches.

Eventually it started to get dark and the roads became impassable. People were going to have to spend the night in their cars. They could not see our home due to the blowing snow. Russ sent the boys to the house while he went back to the cars and with several trips brought people to our home. With his beard all iced up and his thick clothing, I am sure he was a very scary sight for those who trusted him to lead them to our home for the night.

While he brought more and more into our home I served hot tea and cocoa and had the children hunt for every available blanket and sleeping bag in the house. By the time everyone was in the house and warmed up it was past the supper hour. I began to panic wondering what I would feed all these people (there was a total of 16 of us--11 extra to feed).

I had made soup for the five of us for supper and had a loaf of homemade bread. This was all I had ready. I decided to add another cup of water to the soup (what else could I do?). I felt embarrassed that I did not have enough to eat. I really had no time to fix more since people were coming to the house one or two at a time and I had to be at the door to assure them they were welcome and could spend the night. However, our snowbound guests did not seem to mind a bit. They were extremely grateful for a warm house and kept saying they were not hungry.

The soup went all the way around (thanks to that added cup of water) and everyone got one slice of homemade bread. They fellowshipped with one another, finding out who know who and these strangers were united in a common need for hospitality for the night. Although there weren't enough chairs in the house for everyone, the floor worked just fine for this group. As a family, we shared what we had, even if I thought it was not enough. I was especially blessed when one guest asked if we were Christians.

I wonder today if these same guests would remember there was not enough food or chairs. Actually, I have a peace that they only remember a home that welcomed them in a time of need and gave them safety, warmth, a little something to eat, and a place to spend the night.

Drop Ins

In today's world, we have started to plan our gatherings with people instead of being just hospitable. This means fewer people unexpectedly drop in for a visit. Shouldn't our door always be open?

I am honored when someone feels the freedom to stop as they drive by. I can stay busy if I need to while I visit by folding clothes or drying dishes, especially if the visit is fun and the conversation light. However, if the visit is from a friend who needs all my attention, I sit down and put the work on hold.

It has helped me to develop a mindset that real friends who come for a cup a tea and a chat come to see me and not my house. As a saying I once saw states....." If you want to see the house please make an appointment." We live in our home 24 hours a day and it is no showroom. I desire for it to be cozy, warm, and hopefully a haven of rest for those who enter. Drop ins should be welcome at most any time.

Strangers

Abraham was "not forgetful to entertain strangers and thereby entertained angels unaware." (Hebrews 13:2) We had many opportunities to minister to strangers in our farm home along the highway.

Early one Sunday morning we had a very unkempt man come to the house. I saw him approaching and ran for Russ to go to the door to see what he needed. In truth, I was frightened by the way he looked. All he needed was his canteen filled with water (I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink). After visiting with him we found out he was a CEO from a large company out east and was walking across a large portion of America. He was seeing the country and observing people. He was dressed in a style of clothing a hiker would have to wear and carried a backpack. I made a judgment on appearance too quickly. We got his wife's address and sent her a note saying we had seen him and he was doing well, and months later when he got back home we contacted him to see if he had accomplished his goal. He told us he was doing fine and that a newspaper had just done an article on his adventures. We have never seen nor heard from him since but it was one of the many interesting "stranger" experiences for the Swieter family.

Other strangers I can remember were bikers whose tandum had broken down. Since it was dinnertime they ate a meal with us until their help could arrive from Des Moines. (I was better prepared for these two than the 11 of the snowstorm).

We had an interesting 6 years in this rental farm home, where we hope the children learned, as they participated with us, the need to be hospitable. As I think back now about the many people we were able to help while living in this home, I never remember a male stranger experience when Russ was not home. I had females who had run out of gas or were stuck in the snow, but never a man. I also spent 6 months in that house along with the three children one winter (Persian Gulf War) and again, no man ever knocked at my door. Now, years later, I see God's protection over me. I believe He knew my heart to help those in need of hospitality and He protected me from evil.

KISS (Keep it Simple Sister)

Remember that hospitality simply means making people feel welcome, comfortable, and at home. It matters not if you have large home, nice furniture, or a larger meal. Do we have to have all the floors scrubbed and the best dishes set on the table in order to be hospitable? I think not!

Encourage Hospitality in Others

When others are hospitable, I believe it is important to encourage their generosity. I love going to others' homes and I want to be invited back! When someone asks our family over, I have tried to make it a habit to ask if I can bring part of the meal. If it is spur of the moment I can usually grab some homemade jam, pickles, or applesauce off my canned goods shelves. If I know ahead of time, I like to offer a salad and/or dessert. I like to think that, if I take two dishes, then the host only needs to make two. This makes our visit much less stressful and a more relaxing time for all. I insist on helping pick up the dishes and cleaning up the eating ness. I have had some of the nicest visits with another mom as we washed and dried dishes together while the dads kept an eye (or maybe only an ear) on the little ones.

When our children were little it seemed that we were seldom invited to others' homes for fellowship that included the children. I believe I began to see why, as I hosted families with children in our home. From experience as a host, I learned the importance of how much it meant for the parents to keep an eye on the children. Before we went to someone's house, I would drill the little ones in manners, reminding them of the expectation of good behavior. I also instructed our children that they would always remove their shoes when they went elsewhere (a rule in our farmhouse anyway). If they played with toys, I would check to make sure the toys were put back where they were before we came, reassuring the host that this was an issue in manners and appreciation for my children.

Recently God has laid on my heart the fact that we need to be considerate of our parents. Many parents have their children and grandchildren home for dinner. Some do it every Sunday noon (a day of rest) many Sundays if not all Sundays f the year. I know they enjoy having everyone home and like to cook for the kids. However, our parents are not what they used to be (25 years ago) and I believe, as their children, we are some of the last to see they might appreciate some help.

At first they may wonder what you are doing, but I started taking one dish to add to the table without asking. It was something that did not take away from the roast, potatoes and gravy. A fruit salad or a loaf of homemade bread and jam are good starter ideas. When your little ones get big the portion sizes needed increase dramatically and then it is nice to take a couple items, and to ask what you can bring to help. I have started doing this every time we go home and believe it has been helpful and has made our visit less complicated for our parents who are now in their 70's.

Enjoy and do not Grumble

Ladies, I encourage you to attain the virtue of hospitality. Be obedient to God's command and open your home knowing you may be entertaining an angel unaware. Keep in mind that people come to visit you and not your house. "Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling." (1 Peter 4:9) Relax and add another cup of water to the soup.

Attempt to be both a managing Martha and a mingling Mary. Remember people cherish the fellowship more than the food!!

Spur your fellow sisters on to love and good works in hospitality by incorporating some help in the preparation and clean up. See that the children behave and are mannerly. Work together and enjoy the fellowship.

Obey the command to be hospitable and receive God's blessings!

"I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus... Only let us live up to what he have already attained."
~ Philippians 3:12-14,16

This article was reprinted by the permission of Angela Swieter.

It was first published in "The NICHE Newsletter"--January 2000, Vol. 10 Issue 1.

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Dexter, IA 50070

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